


Ignorance Is Bliss…Sometimes

by Sev1970 (mk_malfoy)



Series: Without You Series [2]
Category: Harry Potter - Rowling
Genre: Angst, Gen, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-05-18
Updated: 2005-05-18
Packaged: 2017-10-04 00:11:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mk_malfoy/pseuds/Sev1970
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a dialogue-only fic.  Don't want to spoil WY by giving a summary here, but read that first then read this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ignorance Is Bliss…Sometimes

Date Written: May 18, 2005

Warnings: Angsty, mentions of self harm. I wasn't sure where to put this fic. It is not slash at all, but it does mention male parents. If I am asked, I'll remove it from this category.  
Challenge: Written for the darkones Obliviate Challenge on LJ  
Author's Note: This fic is dialogue only - my first attempt at this, and it is also my first attempt at writing something to be specifically dark. I would be curious to know what everyone thinks. Thanks Magdelena for correcting my mistakes!  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of this. JK Rowling, Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic, Inc., Warner Bros., and any other entities involved are the ones with the money!

~*~ Ignorance Is Bliss…Sometimes ~*~

~*~ Session One ~*~

"Hello Mister Malfoy-Potter. How are you doing this week?"

"Not very well, I'm afraid. I've been having the dreams again."

"Did you talk to your parents as I instructed you to?"

"I tried, but they refused to tell me anything."

"As I told you last week, you must remember this on your own, but talking to other people can help you regain your memories."

"Do you know what happened to me, Mr. Phelps?"

"I do."

"And you cannot tell me anything about it?"

"I am afraid not. If I did, you risk not only losing that memory forever, but losing others that correspond to that memory; ones that are good."

"So there were good memories associated with what I cannot remember?"

"What do you think?"

"My fathers have always told me that no matter how dire things may look, there is always something good that happens as a result."

"So you are saying bad things have a place in our lives?"

"No; I'm saying bad things are a place in our lives."

"Like what happened to your grandparents?"

"Yes. Father said they would not do what Voldemort wanted them to do, so he killed them."

"And your other grandparents?"

"She was killed by a Death Eater. He actually died because he did what Voldemort asked of him. Doesn't make much sense does it?"

"No, but nothing Lord Voldemort did, made sense."

"He killed his own followers."

"Why do you think he did that?"

"So he could control everyone."

"What good would getting rid of people who believe in you, do?"

"It would silence them from ever talking."

"Why do you think Voldemort's followers never spoke of what went on to anyone else?"

"Why would they?"

"Not everyone could possibly have believed him."

"Unfortunately for them, once a Death Eater, always a Death Eater."

"What do you mean?"

"The Dark Mark; it is what all of Voldemort's followers wore on their left arm."

"And it could never be removed?"

"Right."

"So everyone who had this Dark Mark, was a follower of Voldemort?"

"No, sir. My uncle was a Death Eater, but not by choice."

"So, not all people with the Dark Mark should be labeled as Voldemort's followers then?"

"Correct."

"Is there anyway to remove the Dark Mark?"

"No, sir."

"So, as you said, once a Death Eater, always a Death Eater."

"Yes, sir."

"Peter Pettigrew was the unfortunate one to donate his right arm to Voldemort, was he not?"

"He was."

"Just for arguments sake, let's say he gave his left arm. So, his mark would have gone with his arm?"

"I suppose so, sir."

"So, his connection with Voldemort would have been severed?"

"Perhaps physically, it would have been, but mentally, he would still be a Death Eater."

"So, he would be looked down upon by the general public?"

"He would."

"What if he were coerced into getting the mark?"

"He still did bad things."

"What if Voldemort made him do bad things?"

"I don't have an answer for you."

"Do you think Peter Pettigrew was born bad?"

"No, sir."

"When do you think he became bad?"

"I don't know, sir."

"Was your uncle a bad person?"

"No, sir."

"Why did he have the Dark Mark?"

"Some friends of his told him it was a way to gain acceptance."

"And did he gain acceptance?"

"Yes, sir."

"Was it the kind of acceptance he wanted?"

"No, sir."

"There was no way for him to get out?"

"No, sir; he was marked."

"People would not have believed him if he told them he made a mistake and did not truly want to follow Voldemort?"

"Not many would. One did."

"Yes, and do you think this person believed your uncle because he wanted to keep a Death Eater under his watch?"

"No, sir."

"Then why?"

"Because he trusted him."

"But your uncle had the Dark Mark. How could he be trusted?"

"Sir, he never wanted to follow Voldemort; he was not aware of what he was getting into."

"Yet he was marked."

"That means nothing, sir."

"Doesn't it?"

"No, sir."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I don't know, sir."

"Did your uncle betray the one who trusted him?"

"No, sir."

"What happened to him?"

"Like my grandfather, he was killed for doing what he was told."

"So, Voldemort killed two of his followers for doing what he told them to?"

"Yes, sir."

"Was it something good or bad they did?"

"It was neither good nor bad."

"How do you know that it was neither bad nor good?"

"I don't know."

"Do you know what they did?"

"No, sir."

"Why do you think he killed them?"

"Because they knew important information that he did not want anyone to know."

"So Lord Voldemort had an important secret."

"I guess so, sir."

"It must have been some secret."

"I guess so, sir."

"Do you and your fathers get along well?"

"Very well, sir."

"They have always been very protective of you, have they not?"

"Yes, sir, they have."

"May I ask how you lost your left arm below the elbow?"

"I do not know; it happened when I was a child."

"You have no recollection of what happened?"

"No, sir."

"I see. Now, can you please tell me what these dreams you keep having are about?"

"I dream that someone is laughing at me and calling me names. I can see them throwing things at me and then everything changes and they are all bad people trying to get me to be their friends. Somebody is calling me…then I am all alone, and I feel like I am going to explode. My arm hurts, but then I wake up and remember that my arm is not there.

"Some things, Mister Malfoy-Potter are always there, whether we want them to be or not, and then sometimes we believe things are still there when they are long gone. It is our belief in what we see that determines how we live our lives. Now, our time is up for this session. I think you should go home and think about what we have talked about. Perhaps when you return next week, you will remember some of what you have locked away in your mind."

"Yes, sir."

 

~*~ Session Two ~*~

 

"Hello, Mister Malfoy-Potter. How are you doing this afternoon?"

"I think I am beginning to remember, Mr. Phelps."

"Did you speak to your parents?"

"Yes, sir."

"Were they more forthcoming this week?"

"Yes, sir."

"Why do you think that is?"

"I asked them why they were as protective of me as a child as they were."

"And what was their answer?"

"Is this important for me to regain my memories?"

"I would say so, yes. You do not have to speak of anything at all if you wish not to, but if you are serious about remembering your past, then yes, I would suggest you tell me everything."

"My grandfather kidnapped me when I was a baby. Well, it is more complicated then that, but he made my father think I was dead."

"Why did your grandfather kidnap you?"

"I was powerful."

"How so?"

"You know who my father is. He made Voldemort disappear once; Voldemort did not want me doing the same."

"To him?"

"No, sir."

"To someone else?"

"Yes, sir."

"So, he was hoping to keep you on his side to keep you from potentially bringing down someone else?"

"Yes, sir."

"What happened to change this?"

"My other father found me."

"So you were safely removed from where you were?"

"Yes, sir."

"How old were you?"

"Five, sir."

"Did Lord Voldemort ever try to reclaim you?"

"Yes, sir."

"How did he do that?"

"He kidnapped me."

"What happened next?"

"I was found and taken back to my fathers."

"This is what your parents told you?"

"Yes, sir."

"Did anyone ever try to take you again after that time?"

"Yes, sir."

"When?"

"At my uncle's wedding. I fell unconscious and when I woke up, my daddy said the bad man was gone."

"You sound distressed. Why is this?"

"Because I can remember everyone looking at me, and crying."

"Do you know why this is?"

"No, sir."

"Were you happy growing up?"

"Yes, sir."

"Did you have many friends?"

"Lots, sir."

"Other than family?"

"No, sir."

"Why not?"

"I don't know, sir."

"How old were you when you did your first magic?"

"I was five, sir."

"When you lost your arm, do you remember how your parents and friends reacted?"

"No, sir."

"Do you have a lot of friends now?"

"Yes, sir."

"Do you miss your arm?"

"I guess so. I am accustomed to not having it, but it would be nice if I still had it though."

"Did you know your father almost became a Death Eater? They say he was seconds away from being marked."

No response

"Mister Malfoy-Potter?"

"But he didn't, sir. He fell in love with my other father, and that kept him from getting marked. Then they had me. And then…"

"Yes?"

"Oh my gods, he marked me…Voldemort marked me so I would always be his no matter who I lived with. I was his…oh gods. I remember. They all kept their children away from me after the wedding, after everyone found out. Most everyone knew I was okay, and did not pose a threat, but some didn't. Some of the children were so cruel to me, but my daddies told me not to listen to them. Oh Merlin, I couldn't take it anymore, the whispers, and the looks of hatred from the people who did not know me, only knew of the mark. I cut off my arm with my wand. I don't remember how, but I know I did it. I wanted it to be gone, and it was. Oh then Daddy Harry ran in and I can hear him screaming for my Daddy Draco. They were both crying, but I remember smiling because I knew the only thing that separated me from everyone else was now gone. I knew I could be normal again."

"Do you remember anything else?"

"I remember my Daddy Harry saying something quietly, and saying for me to sleep well and have sweet dreams…Oh my gods, he obliviated my memory of what I did, but somehow it also removed everything I knew about my mark. I guess he did not want me to remember anything about the mark, or me removing it. I thought it was vile and made me a dirty person, but it didn't, did it?"

"No, it didn't. The mark was simply a representation of evil, but it was not evil in and of itself. Then once Voldemort died, it meant nothing at all in reality, but I am guessing to each person who bore it, it represented a prison sentence."

"My parents raised me to be tolerant and accepting of all types of people, but, I couldn't even stand myself. How is it that I could have been so upset with myself that I would remove my arm?"

"We all know what we can take and what we cannot, and sometimes things get to be too much. Your fathers helped you as best they could, but they knew you were the one who would have to live with the Dark Mark. They could not keep you from hating yourself. It is sad that it came to you doing something so drastic to remove your pain. I hate to say this, but I am glad your parents obliviated that act. I think you would have reverted and blamed yourself more for what happened if you had to live with what you had done."

"So, I remembered it all, on my own, with help. I am not a bad person, Mr. Phelps."

"No you aren't, and I am glad you finally figured that out for yourself."

"People judged me before they knew the facts."

"That they did."

"I was a happy child, Mr. Phelps, always. Well, now I know otherwise, but I am glad my fathers allowed me to be happy and not have any bad memories. It is probably wrong what they did, but they did it because they loved me so much."

"Are you upset with them?"

"Never. No, they gave me a gift, and I think it is time I thanked them for it."

"Then I guess we do not need to continue these sessions. You have found the memories that were locked away. Now you only have to find a way to accept them, which I think you already have."

"Yes, sir. Thank you, Mr. Phelps."

"You're welcome. Mr. Malfoy-Potter."

~*~ The End ~*~


End file.
